Thursday, December 30, 2004

A New Ear

for all the nonsense we hear around us......

Manmohan Singh will discover the man within like a certain Mohan Bhargava we know, and stop singing Italian tunes.
Americans will have a new president as George W Bush gives up the presidency in favour of his long cherished ambition - to become a permanent faculty at america's premier institute - MIT- institute for the Most Insane Truants.
Nipplegate will become a tradition at Superbowl, with actresses, models, singers, socialites all vying for the honour (of course there will be a live telecast by DD)
Uma Bharti will feature in an Adnan sami video, thus giving cross border cultural relations the much needed boost.

Shahid and Kareena will tie up with Airtel to provide live lessons of mouth to mouth resusciation so that people can use it on other people when the need arises.
Chandrababu Naidu's plans will become the blueprint for development activities in all states.
Real Madrid will pay the biggest contract amount ever to get Bhaichung Bhutia and complete their star ensemble.
Yechury and his ilk will be sent to his beloved land Russia, to be more specific, Siberia, forever.
Potholes will be found only in museums as they would be a thing of the past.
Traditional Indian stuff will make a huge comeback as things like sari (with accessories like blouse) and karva chauth will be endorsed by Mallika Sherawat, Neha Dhupia etc.
Sourav Ganguly will become the first non playing captain ever, in the history of the game.
Women will be legally permitted to cut off the appendages of men who try to use it on them without their permission.
I will convince myself that the paunch i possess is not an integrated 6 pack.
School children will use MMS for more constructive purposes like copying during exams.
Holland will take on Bangladesh and India in a triangular series to decide the #1 team in one day internationals.
Laloo Prasad Yadav will be given charge of the ministry of animal husbandry so that he can manage buffaloes and other ministers, and keep his nose out of mechanical contraptions like trains which are beyond his scope of reality.
Indians will find it in their hearts to outsource labour intensive work like construction to developing nations like USA.
Seers will take over the business activities of bhais, and corporates like Ambanis will seek them to eliminate those who try to bring out shady deals.
TV ads without Amitabh Bachhan will be back.

That, if you look closely was literally the manuscrypts wishlist for the year 2005, some with tongue in check, while others with tongue firmly in cheek.

until next time, go get that new year.... and spare a thought, a prayer and anything else you can spare for the less fortunate. this might be of help. (thanks kraz)

Monday, December 27, 2004

The Cemetery

he had the graveyard shift today. unlike others, he always had it, because after all he was watching over the cemetry.. but again, unlike others, he liked this, watching over the remains of an existence that once was.. youth, old, male, female.. once in the cemetry age, sex, nationality , nothing mattered.... to the monitors that scanned the cemetry they were all the same.
they would not have spared their mortality a thought while they existed. it was only when age and fatigue slowly crept up on them that some of them would have even thought about mortality.. of course there were some who were so young that they werent capable of such thoughts, their existence was as though a little kid was given control of the life creating mechanism- the kid crated the life, then, treated it like most of his other toys- played with it till he got bored and then either ignored it or snuffed its existence... yes, these little ones deserved pity, for they did not know what it was to grow, and grow old; they didnt have the time to love enough, or be loved enough, in their short burst of existence they were given a glimpse...
the majority of the occupants were ones that had gone through the entire life cycle, felt the pain and joy of existence, felt happiness, sorrow, anger, hate, envy, love, peace, companionship and all the thrills and frills of existence...
his job was to guard the cemetry, from gravediggers, who came to pilfer from the remains of what once was.. but that was the lesser part of the job, there was another part which actually made the job interesting to him.. sometimes while he sat staring at the monitors, he would suddenly detect an occupant coming back to life..strange, but true!!
for these were no ordinary cemetries, they were giant servers - virtual cemetries, that housed blogs which had ceased to exist, and to him, there was no sight more thrilling than a blogger becoming active again...
this one's for all those blogs i once used to read, for those who have moved on....
until next time, think about the symmetry...

Thursday, December 23, 2004

Doctor who ?

It wasnt a normal delivery, and the doctor certainly didnt appreciate it. For although midnight and early morning deliveries were quite common, he still wasnt accustomed to them. he would have still not minded it, except for two things - the father who was sulking, and the fact that the couple had chosen not to have the delivery in a hospital. must be one of those new fangled ideas that youngsters today came up with...
the father claimed that this was a premature delivery, and the doctor also felt that there was something else that was bothering him. but the doctor was still of the opinion that the father had no right to sulk, for only a madman would have brought his wife on a roadtrip in such a late state of pregnancy!! amazingly, in spite of all this, the woman in question was quite calm, as though she could see beyond all this. in contrast, the doctor was bemused by all the eyes that were focused on him, human and animal, for it looked like all the animals in the vicinity had decided to take an intetest in the pregnancy, maybe it was some primitive bond they shared.
thankfully though there was no light, the candles and the extra shiny night sky made sure that visibility was not a problem. as he was tussling with the pregnant situation, the scene became more bizarre. in walked three people. and no ordinary ones, at least one he certainly recognised, and two others he thought he did, but couldnt place... with a supreme effort, he concentrated on his job, and though it was a difficult one, he was finally rewarded.
a beautiful, smiling boy. and as though a pleasant message was delivered to him, the father was suddenly all smiles. as the visitors and the father congratulated the doctor on the good work, the father murmured,"he's not mine, but i'll raise him like a son of god".
the doctor looked into the baby's eyes, and was suddenly filled with peace. but he had a sneaking suspicion that his role in all this would be edited in the annals of history. but, inspite of that thought, he decided he would remember this day and celebrate it every year....
until next time, merry christmas...

Monday, December 20, 2004


I used to hate them... they were different at different stages in life, but they were always there.. at every stage - to mock, to ridicule.. to dare, to challenge, to provoke..
and they were never the same person... from the kid who got better marks than me in class 1 to the one who got the first prize in music/ quiz/ debate... to the cousin who managed to get an engineering/medicine admission to some slightly older distant relative who managed to go to the US... to the peer who got into IIT to the ones who earn more than me now... the challenges were good in the beginning, and with luck playing a major part, the ego used to have many days to gloat.. until one day, it finally dawned on me that if it continued in the same fashion, the battles would never end, there would always be a new 'benchmark person' around the corner... and also, that while i was chasing 'targets', i was automatically becoming a target myself... i was also gradually becoming the 'benchmark persons' i hated.....
i stopped active participation..and followed the floyd mantra as in 'the fletcher home memorial'
"take your overgrown infants ,
and build them a home,
a place of their own'......."
"..did they expect us to treat them with any respect,
they can polish their medals and sharpen their smiles,
and abuse themselves playing games for a while,
boom boom bang bang lie down you're dead........"

but sometimes i wonder if i have actually got rid of them ... because even now, when i am seemingly 'in control' of my life, and forced justifications arent necessary.. i guess they still exist in my mind..but times are different, i dont acknowledge battles now, i sneak up, in my own time, and move on...hehe...not a nice habit, i know.... old habits die hard.... but die they will.....
until next time, be game....

P.S : message for ash : cant comment on your site. they accuse my IP of spamming .. :(

Thursday, December 16, 2004

The Bestseller

She sighed, putting the final touches to her latest creation. one would have thought that after so many of them, lethargy would set in and she would stop. but no, it was as though she understood that she was in a league of her own, and on her depended the future. well, if truth be told, in her line of work, she was the past, present and future.
sometimes she wondered if people really had a choice. not really, because if she discounted the guy whose very existence was thanks to her (he added his own flavours to her creations, and rarely took pains to be original), she had unchallenged supremacy. but these days, he was suddenly becoming more than a slight irritant, because his flavours were fast growing in popularity. she often wondered why, because personally, he found his style quite morbid and gruesome.
she also wondered if she should style herself that way,but she loved her characters too much, many of whom were quite famous in their own right, sometimes rivalling her in terms of fan clubs and cults. but she didnt mind that, after all they were her creations. maybe his flavours were just a fad, and would pass.
she smiled to herself thinking of the debates that went on in her name, the ones she triggered through her creations, mostly because she was not a public figure (she believed her work spoke for itself and did not warrant public appearances) and therefore, an easy subject to speculative minds. sometimes, in a particularly naughty mood, she would hint that she was not a woman, but a man; sometimes even say that she was not one, but a set of entities.
she was sure her latest creation would also be a bestseller, just like all the ones before. and like all the ones before, there would be reactions ranging from love to hate, anger to awe, and despair to hope, and they would use her name again, in vain or in a lighter vein - 'GOD'!!

until next time, dont lose your character!!

Monday, December 13, 2004

Next Blog >>

There have been a few times where i have pressed that particular button on the top right corner..most times curious whether i would find somebody from my list as the next blog.. that would be a good random experience/ coincidence, isnt it?
these travels take me to blogs of various kinds, many of them in languages i cant understand.. some of them with the regular blogger templates and others in which people have put in a lot of effort on the template and customised it totally... but the majority of those blogs usually have zilch visitors, and mind you, some of them are quite good... and again, many of these have been around for quite some time..i wonder what motivates them to keep on writing..
frankly, inspite of the 'i write for myself' philosophy, i couldnt dream of sustaining the blog if none of you guys commented... i guess its a matter of mindset - expectations from the blog... i think the reason why blogger has that button has some similarity with my reason for blogging..a search for people who think like me, well maybe not like me, but think something that will interest me..
the reason for this discourse, you ask? a certain aquatic lifeform :) commented sometime back that the 'right clique' was growing.. i started off a reply and realised that it was a postable thought.. and in these desperate times, when, like bollywood, good subjects are so hard to come by, such thoughts are precious..hehe..well, the reasons why the clique is changing - adding blogs that interest me, linking back people who are kind enough to link me, deleting blogs which are confirmed to be inactive (i'm sure hek will be back soon :) ), deleting blogs whose content do not appeal anymore (extremely rare cases), deleting blogs whose owners wouldn't mind me taking them off. in fact, i would go a step further, they wouldn't know i put them here, so they wouldnt know i took them off either..hehe.
so thats why the list keeps changing... because though all blogs are special places, those on my list are extra special to me..
until next time, specialise ;)

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Darna Mana hai / 2

the title because it has been inspired by RGV's 'Darna mana hai'.. 6 stories, one we have only 3, but all have the same ending..
Story 1 : Shot of a young chap grinning from ear to ear as he greets his old friends at a night club...A red car cuts a screeching turn as its driver competes with an old lady for the same parking space. Our hero stops the roughneck, starts a conversation. Looking lost, the driver tries to recognise our hero. Stalling for time, our hero continues with the conversation by complimenting his friend on his biceps. Finally he says, "Hai na Bunty?" But the tough guy turns out to be someone else! By this time... the old lady deftly glides her car into the parking lot much to the chagrin of the roughneck. He goes back to his friends who compliment him. zoom to his face, he says...

Story 2: An award nite for ads. The winning company's top exec goes on stage to pick up the award, while the team looks on. Once on stage, he beckons to the team to join him on the stage. teamspirit... and how does boss celebrate, zoom to his face, he says...

Story 3 : he held on for as long as he could. finally he walked painful steps to the teacher and whispered something to her. sadist that she was, the 2nd standard class teacher looked at her watch, 20 minutes left for close of class. she told him, "only 20 minutes left, wait"he refused to give up, and looked pleadingly at her.
*a rare moment of understanding*.
she said "okay , go, but come back soon!". as he stood in the loo, and felt a wave of relief, zoom to his face, he says...

The ending
"number 1, mera number 1"

ever since i saw McDowell's surrogate advertising, this one was coming!!
until next time, hold on to your high spirits.

Monday, December 06, 2004

Leaving on a jetplane

Son: I'll be leaving soon
Dad: Where? Why?
S: I've figured out my career plans
D: thats good news, so i guess you must've chosen your college
S: Yes
D: you almost scared me, hope you have chosen someplace nearby, so you can come home often
S: thats what i wanted to speak to you about, i want to go abroad
D: abroad!! i think i know where... but why? you have the best places to study here.
S: maybe, but it helps to have a global perspective.
D: but what about your culture, religion.. you are at an age when you can be easily influenced by their thoughts, customs
S: that could happen here too, and i guess, it already is..
D: yes, but there you hardly have any relatives, there's no one to watch out for you
S: thats how we learn, dad!! besides what about all those cousins of mine, i thought you were quite proud of them, the way you used to go on with 'how well that boy is doing now.." besides thats the most happening market now.
D: its all just a phase, a fantasy waiting to be shattered and what if you end up like one of your illustrious cousins, marrying one of them?! your mom would die of a broken heart!!
S: Dad, you are just letting your imagination run wild. as for the shattering,they have been saying that for decades now!!
D: maybe, but i dont think the locals take kindly to us going there and taking away their jobs.
S: its just survival , dad.. whoever gets it done cheaper!! and look at the scene here, unemployment is rampant!!
D: but we are improving, nowadays they say that cutting edge tech work gets done here...
S: no, dad, thats what everyone thinks, but the real action gets done there.. its certainly our guys, but despite whatever we claim, we still only have a miniscule share of the software pie!! and who knows, maybe i'll come back here and work..
D: thats what they all say, but they end up settling there... they even have a term for it - brain drain!!
S: the job is a decision i shall take later, but i have decided, i am going to India!!

a conversation i hope will happen in the US,a few decades from now!

until next time, remember that a broad isnt everything!!

Thursday, December 02, 2004

Losing the marbles

"You didnt reply to my letter",said the younger one, A.
"which one?", the elder, M, responded.
A: the one in which i questioned some decisions taken at the sports club's last meeting on the marbles.
M: i had asked the club secretary to respond. as president, i dont have time to reply to all the letters that come to me. and if you wanted to tell me something, you could have spoken, instead of sending a letter.
A: maybe, but a letter from the vice president of the club is not exactly any letter,specially when the subject is the last meeting and the decisions taken then. and more so, if the decision has to do with the marbles, our principal assets.
M: i was only putting the rights i already had, on paper.
A: thats arguable.
M: Dad had always said that the elder son, thats me, would be in control, though the ownership is for both of us. ask ma.
(Ma: dont involve me. your dad started the club and ran it. i have no idea about its activities.)
A: which means i'll have no say in any decision on the marbles.
M: not so, just that i will be taking the final decison
A: but many of the marbles are doing well now because of my efforts.
M: maybe, but they wouldnt be anything now without the entire set. stand alone, their value would crash in a jiffy.
A: your itch isnt about the sports club at all, is it? its about me standing for the school election and getting elected.
M: i dont even want to talk about it. you didnt even ask me for an opinion. and if you were so interested in the club activities and playing with marbles, you wouldnt be in school politics. i bet that silly girlfriend of your must be the brain behind it,since she's into the cultural scene herself.
A: my intention was only to get more support for the club activities at the school. and ifyou were so interested in my life and activities at the club, you would have ventured an opinion without me asking for it. and i dont think you need to bring my girlfriend into this. in any case, yours was also very much into dance till recently!!
M: whats the point discussing all this now? what do you want from me?
A: either more powers as VP of the club or independent control of the marbles whose reputation i built.
M: the board will have to decide that.
A: whats the use, since dad's death, you have been playing around, garnering votes. now, many of the old guys have left, and the rest are your puppets.
M: thats an unjust accusation.
A: i think i will have to move in other ways to get whats rightfully mine.
M: thats your wish.
The vultures were waiting and this was when they decided to come to the party. As one onlooker put it, after the founding father's death, it was only a matter of time before the sons lost their marbles, literally!!

until next time, keep playing games...

Monday, November 29, 2004

The calling...

thats a good band, but this post aint about them, its about us..
virtual acquaintances- to each other, thats mostly what we are..
my tryst with yahoo messenger began during my post grad days, i think it was the place where 'manuscrypts' as a term originated... all my yahoo friends were people who were known to me 'really'.. so there was no question of 'virtual personalities''s only blogging where most of the people i know are 'virtual personalities'.. to a certain extent, they are only as virtual as their photos online.. but then again,i think i've seen only simon's, pradeep's and wings'. to be fair, images helped me find a cousin who blogs, but that, i think, was only an aberration...i have never been too fond of blogmeets, simply because i love the anonymity and the'someone, somewhere' feeling (no, not the 'made for you' one, a little more ordinary)..
more importantly, to maintain a forum where judgements are made only based on thoughts and words, not the physical manifestations... to put it a lil more bluntly acne, dandruff, body odour etc dont matter on the net.. at a similarly superficial level, nor do complexion, looks etc... personalities are what they write...but, increasingly, i find that more friends are being made on blogs than in real life,maybe because, there is no compulsion, i can read someone's writings, if i like what i read, i'll be back, else i wont.. simple, and no baggage.. and people take hints much better online..hehe..
maybe its easier to reach a comfort level this way, without the regular constraints... the next step in evolution, is to find out whether once the comfort level is achieved, can it be scaled upto the real friends level? times have changed, havent they? from building friendships in the real world and facing the challenge of maintaining them online to building friendships online and facing the challenge of maintaining them in the real world?
someone in the list is coming to bangalore, so here's calling all creatures of the web, what about a meet over coffee??
until next time, virtually yours...

Thursday, November 25, 2004

Home run

both posts this week on home, but this week being the way it is, i shall stay with the spirit of things and write a 'homely' post...
all things arranged exactly the way i want it.. and changeable whenever i feel like it... always there whenever i decide to be there... a safe haven, a place where friends come to visit me, a place where i could spend hours on end, a place for which i could spend endless hours shopping..where every little thing is a manifestation of my self in some way or other... a place which could even reflect my changing mood if i so wish...few places could be so comfortable, this place that has been made according tomy specifications and for me...thats what is home.. amazing, home can also be spelled 'blog', and the feeling still remains the same.. maybe they did think about it when they coined 'homepage'....but a question lurks - is it comfort or control that makes home 'home'?
menawhile, here's a good dee for the day... will leave you with some lines from my fave band...
" A long time ago came a man on a track
Walking thirty miles with a pack on his back
And he put down his load where he thought it was the best
Made a home in the wilderness
He built a cabin and a winter store
And he ploughed up the ground by the cold lake shore
And the other travellers came riding down the track
And they never went further, no, they never went back...."
until next time, enjoy your home...

Monday, November 22, 2004

Small Town blues

No, its not about SwB..hehe.. its about guys like me, who have migrated to a bigger city,managed to find a particular groove here, and are comfortable the way they are.. except for the moments when the 'small town blues' hit them...
i have always said that you are lucky if you are born in a big city, no, not because of the neon lights, but because you can choose to spend your entire life in a city you were born in.. of course, all of us do have that choice, but the small town guys make most of their judgements with a lot of constraints' baggage, the biggest these days being job availability...
there is a certan joy of travelling on the same roads, watching things change, going by yourold school, seeing familiar faces, walking in the parks that you played in as a child, feeling the sea wind on your face and watching different ships on the same port, feeling safe, speaking in a language you have been speaking forever, hanging out in places that you know inside out, seeing the night lights - forever growing brighter...
of course floyd has a different version in 'time' -
"kicking around on a piece of ground in your hometown,
waiting for someone or something to show you the way.
tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain,
you are young and life is long and there is time to kill today,
and then one day you find ten years have got behind you,
no one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun."........
(speaking of floyd, please check this out)
but i'd still say that for people born in a big city, there are memories of a time that once was,for us, there are memories of a time and place, that once were.... "but i guess thats why they call it the blues"
until next time, blue is my favourite color

Friday, November 19, 2004

Evolution and the Theory of God

have finished reading a book called 'Tomorrow's God', which got me to relook at my spirituality, thereby adding some twists to my earlier posts on the issue...
though i wtote of a system, i had God in it. this book eliminated God as we know him (to be fair, the book warns of this at the outset)... it spoke of a system, of which everything is a part and evolution happened because random objects/organisms moved to a higher state of frequency randomly.(this might help)..the book vehemently opposes the present version of God, because it believes that things become far too easy when we can blame it on a God over whom we have no control, our actions,our behaviour etc can be easily attributed to the way God made us... actually, we are all messiahs of ourselves with our own selfish agenda.
the book advocates a system, with every part of the system being responsible for whatever happens in the system...that is, all that occurs in the system is our responsibility, collectively and directly proportionate to our means that whenever we do something, anything, we should also think of the effects that action/inaction will have, not just on ourselves, but everything else in the system...good thought, huh??
but, meanwhile, i also get reminded of mel gibson's words from 'signs'...something that meant "there are two kinds of people in this world... group 1 - who believe that nothing happens by chance.. in times of crisis, deep inside them, they believe that someone is watching over them, that gives them hope... and group 2- who believe that everything is a random occurence.. in times of crisis, deep inside, they know, they are all they've got, that fills them with fear...
until next time, have faith in your god...

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

soldier of fortune

it wasnt as though he had been forced to go. he had made the choice himself, knowing fully well, the dangers, the obvious ones as well as the hidden ones...this mission was particularly dangerous, because the terrain was unfamiliar. well, not exactly, but times were dangerous now, and the roads on which he once used to whistle aloud, were fraught with danger, danger lurking in every bend..and it was dark..
but the prize was worth it, and he had committed anyway..he started out, moving carefully. though these paths were ones he had done a reconnaisance the same morning, he was careful, because a harmless looking shack could suddenly become a hive of activity.
suddenly the explosions started, but these were the ones he had expected, he gritted his teeth and moved on... there was a period of calm, but as he edged closer towards his target, the explosions began again. he had to be more careful now, because these were not paths he had visited in the morning, and it didnt help that the enemy had dug trenches all over the place...
speaking of the enemy, there were so many of them... and so many weapons, of different kinds.. the world had progressed so rapidly that the weapons he had been trained in were almost obsolete now.. but that was quite some time ago, and he was no longer as young and agile as he once was...
finally he reached his destination, the prize was there, and worth it..he took his time, savouring every moment, but secretly fearful of the return journey...
soon,it was time to go, he knew he had to be more careful now, for the prizehad made him a little less alert. but the consolation was that he knew the paths better now... but that consolation did not last long, because he realised that the explosions had increased.. once, he saw a guy in front of him swerve and struggle to retain control, as a shell exploded right in front of him.
the last stretch proved to be the most difficult, as consecutive explosions behaved as though they were specifically targeting him!!finally, he was he took off his helmet, he moaned at what he had to go through for a dine out on diwali night.. hell, it was no longer a celebration, it was war... and he had indeed been a fortunate soldier to get back in one piece...
until next time, dont burst with excitement!!

Thursday, November 11, 2004

Lights... Action!!

four days of holidays ahead, so the grateful self thought he should write a few words about the phenomenon thats making it possible..diwali...
the earliest memories are getting dressed up in the white kurta,pyjama set(the one for special occasions), going into the storeroom, taking out the earthern diyas, cleaning them and arranging them on the window ledges... career highs included being allowed to handle oil and light the diyas myself...
simultaneously happening was the cracker department, which had its own career path- from a rookie user, who was not allowed to handle stuff without permission, to the gradual scaling up of the stuff that could be used..the pinnacle being the rocket, i guess, which had to be launched carefully lest it created a "neighbour's envy, owner's pride' effect in the neighbours'house... and finally , the top seat being the buying of crackers and their division among users.....well, once we reach the peak, the only way is down..
i stopped celebrating the year we shifted residence...did celebrate in patches later, but more as a desperate effort to recreate the magic of the days that were gone... a lost cause that redeemed itself only in the joyful faces i saw around me.......
P.S. though south indians usually use 'deepavali', these days, in our house, it is 'diwali', since 'wali' pronounced slightly differently, means 'fart' in malayalam, and....

until next time, have a blast :)

Monday, November 08, 2004

A piece of history........

this post whirled into my mind, due to a comment made on my shoutbox sometime back... :)
the written word has for long been a great tool for storage - storage of thoughts, of happenings and whatever one feels should be recorded somewhere... of course there are some who feel that a picture would do the trick, but to each his own, is all i'll say about that.. and it doesn't actually matter because this post would also relate to photographs - after all they are also storage devices...
whether it is the written word or the photograph, the creator, at least in his subconscious, feels it is for posterity... a tool which would give himself or others an account of the moment/era in which it was taken, whenever it is seen again.... but as time passes, and i mean, a long time, they either get lost or if they do appear, do so in museums or private collections..i dont know about the photos, but the written words do get called manuscripts.
pieces of history which gives us glimpses of what had been..only glimpses, because though the creator would have wanted it to be a complete explanation, we can only make calculated guesses, and whether we are right in our guesses, is also, only a guess........
millions of bloggers worldwide writing daily accounts/ thoughts on the world they live in, the world of their dreams, technology, music, sex, philosophy, careers... what kind of glimpses will they provide to the people in 4004, words staring back from a visual interface, perhaps loaded from an ancient server...
so, is it history we are typing? our present, someone's history... called manuscrypts, bloughts, whirlwings, jabberwhackies... all with their own explanations.....
until next time, keep making history :)

Friday, November 05, 2004

In my dreams....

a couple of days back, someone told me about a movie called 'waking life'. think its an old movie (2001), but have somehow managed to miss it. in it, there is a hypothesis - what if our dreams were the reality? and the converse.... reminded me of the old one liner-"consciousness - that annoying time between naps".. but what if...
but thats not what this post is about, this is about dreams, the same dreams, but in a different context...
once upon a time people used to have dreams.. a bunch of dreams that would be achieved over a lifetime, and the joy that came about due to the fulfilment of dreams was one of a kind..we have ambitions and aspirations now, but are we dreaming now?
if i had to compare 'dreams' and 'aspirations/ambitions' , i'd say that 'dreams' are more humane. i wonder if you understood that, but i have no tangible way i can share it with you, its just a thought... and the way we have changed 'dreams' into 'ambitions/aspirations'is by making it a lot easier to achieve them.
earlier people dreamt of buying a home, but now its just an emi away, same goes for a car, consumer durables. instant gratificationis the new mantra - from flat screens to flat tummies and from intercourse to interactive TV..
love, which is arguably the biggest dream factory, is also a very attainable thing - from confessionsof love by sms/ e-cards to marrying the one of your choice (which have moved from taboo stage to norm)....the argument would be "isnt it better that way"... yes it is, but not at the cost of dreams..
once upon a time, a guy called lennon said "Imagine all the people living life in peace. You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one." wonder if he would say that now..
until next time, dream
(P.S. the title also happens to be one of my
favourite songs :) )

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Losing my religion - II

the system
since i essentially slept through the weekend, and had a very uninteresting existence, i thought i would stick to some gyan distribution..tell me when the series gets boring..hehe..
the auto pilot- that which propels us through the mundane things of life,and mundane here is an extremely wide array of things. propels us to do things in a predictable way..the auto pilot is an essential part of the system, but the key is the higher being inside us. if we can find it and awaken it, it will guide us to higher levels of consciousness.
heres an interesting example i picked up from "Tomorrow's God" that best explains the working of the system - consider a rock, it is at a particular frequency..left to itself, it will become a diamond, after eons of temperature/pressure consider the rock in the hands of a human, who, within hours can get the diamond out of the rock, with his science , because he is at a much higher frequency/ level of consciousness.
from the rock's point of view, the rock is the highest state of frequency,but we humans know it is not. but we humans also think we are at the highest level, no we are not..but the good part is that higher the level of consciousness, the easier it is to move ahead..think about this, millions of years to move from cell to organism, lesser millions of years from organism to 'human' form, tens of thousands of years to move through hunter/gatherer mode, thousands of years to move through agrarian civilisations, hundreds of years to move through industrial revolutions, decades to move through technological revolutions.. if you look closely you will see a movement starting with collective consciousness,(a system whose constituents were aware of its existence) to self consciousness, where we are now.. it is a cycle and now its time we started to think of collective consciousness again....the collective consciousness is the system where conscious thoughts and therefore actions are not based on 'i', but on 'us'.and the collective consciousness is the fastest way to the higher 'us'.
before i extol the system, there is a small deviation i will take...until next time, be conscious....

Friday, October 29, 2004

Sex and the kutty

another long weekend, this time its monday off for the kannada rajyotsava.. holidays are like runs in cricket, dont matter how they come, so long as they come..:)
oh, for the few who are not familiar with MTV's 'lola kutty' or south indian lingo, 'kutty' means,among other things 'child'.. the title is based on a good fwd i read, ordinarily i would have put it under trivia, but it gives a good lesson on how the template works, so it is the post itself..
so, heres the fwd
A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is working,and asks him: - "Daddy, what's Sex?".
"OK!" He thinks...this day was bound to come, and I am not going to let my little princess learn about Sex from the streets.He sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse,sperms and eggs. He tells her about puberty, menstruation, erections, wet dreams.....
Then she asks:- "Daddy, what is "A Couple?"

He carries on: a couple are the two people involved in sex, but this can be two males also who we call gays, or two females who we call lesbians, and goes on to describe oral sex, group sex, pornography, bondage and rape, paedophilia, sex toys, etc...:
The father finally asks:- "So why did you want to know about "a couple" and "Sex"?
"Oh, mummy said lunch will be ready in a couple of secs..."

until next time, this is food for thought :)

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

Losing my religion

Part 1 - Templates

a few days back, someone excitedly brought his laptop over to me, and showed me a was a series of basic mathematic addition questions,which had to be answered as quickly as possible, but the last question was to name a color and a tool - i said 'red hammer'... he scrolled down and the mail said "red hammer". he had said red hammer too, we tried it on some more people, and around 90% said 'red hammer', which figured, coz the mail said around 90% inthe world would say 'red hammer'.
consider this- you go for a movie -second show. during the break, you go to the loo, in the next cubicle u see a friend and 90% of us would say "what are you doing here?"
countless situations where we thought 'i was about to say that'....the same music we like, the same tv shows, the same content in blogs, the feeling of deja vu in numerous situations... all what we call coincidences...
and so, the hypothesis - templates, many in number, but yes, all of us templates nevertheless, programmed to respond in a certain way in a certain sitiuation... which is why there are only so many responses to any sitiuations, which is why inventions and discoveries arent exactly think matrix, predictable :), so far maybe, but here's where the hypothesis deviates because we are not having any 'machine conspiracy' around..
lets deviate a little anyway, when you get back home today, try thinking about what you did for the last hour, not the easy response of a generic answer "i was travelling back from work", but a minute by minute would find that most of the actions were on auto pilot, like changing gears in a car...and therefore you wouldnt remember...
another lil experiment for you, on a regular working day,can you go without saying 'hi'?.. you would perhaps remember not to say it for an hour, then 'auto pilot' would take over...back to the hypothesis, all of us have an auto pilot, all of us also have a higher being inside us, a being constantly ignored in favour of the easier 'auto pilot', but extremely important, nevertheless..why? that is for later parts.
until next time, be unpredictable :)

Thursday, October 21, 2004

Mission Mars

Since this is a long weekend, and I am already in clutches of one of my most fave emotions - laziness, I came to the early conclusion that I couldn't get myself to write an original post.Wokay, now that that is done with, let me present you an adapted version of a cool forward I got a few days back. Bangalore readers will identify with it promptly, and as for readers from others places, well, india may be a land of diversity in a lot of things, but as far as quality of roads go, we share a common here goes
Bangalore 2.a.m.

a time of the night when loneliness is the only companion, shadows the only followers, and beer, the only fuel. He was bouncing away merrily on his bike, when some bright lights stopped him. Yippee, movie shooting, he thought, will get to see some stars tonight. But, wait..uh oh!! I'm going to be kidnapped and they are going to do experiments on me, but wait again, this is no alien landing either.
He saw a well-clad man of foreign origin, and started walking towards him.
"Shhh", cautioned the man.
Softly he asked " What's happening brother?".
"NASA..."the man whispered, "I am Dr. Morgan from the Mission Mars programme".
A thought crossed his mind, "i am not the only one who's had beer"
But, on watching a few men in spacesuits bumping around, he realised the man was speaking the truth. He got talking to Dr.Morgan and was informed that NASA had been trying to create surroundings that would resemble the rocky, crater filled Southern Hemisphere of Mars and had failed miserably.This led to a desperate search for test sites on planet earth.
Very few places on earth qualified, only Iraq (exploded Oil Wells), Sri Lanka, and Bangalore's own Bannerghatta Road.
With Iraq ruled out as a high-risk venture, and no shooting possible in Sri Lanka because of the prevailing cease fire (bush handled this personally?!!), India was the only feasible option. Plus the costs were rock bottom. And although a few questions were posed on yet another outsourcing to bangalore, they were quickly resolved, because of the unparalleled surface that Bannerghatta road offered.
The Mars rover and Endeavour were bouncing away too, on the rugged surface.
Suddenly, he spotted the CM standing quietly in the distance. He walked up to him and smiled. The CM nodded, smiling softly.
He looked at the CM enquiringly and asked "Was this your idea"?
"Yes" the CM said almost humbly, too modest to acknowledge the enormity of his effort.
"So, what's in it for us?" he probed.
"Millions of dollars, that's what they have promised, and once this gets approved as a broken earth site it will be used regularly, for other missions too. I also have plans of breaking up the other roads, which are happening under the guise of flyovers" the CM confided.
He shuddered at the enormity of the attempt. How all of us puny Bangaloreans cribbed, raved and ranted every time we came across a broken road. How blind we have all been, eyes shut, we refused to view the big picture. Every bad road is a million-dollar opportunity. He silently bade farewells to Dr. Morgan and the CM and rode away.
As he reached the BTM flyover, he got a flat tyre, he looked down at the guilty protruding rockfragment, and uncharacteristically smiled. Pushing the bike slowly, he thought to himself "the martians must be green with envy"

until next time, enjoy the ride

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Am I Doing Something - about it.....?

A topic i had wanted to write on since i saw 'phir milenge'..(when i saw 'philadelphia', i wasnt blogging)....
for a long time, i had maintained that awareness kills fear..the child's fear of the dark, for example - once it realises that there is nothing in the dark that causes harm, it loses the fear.although there are a lot of things which dont fall under this categorisation, those, i believe,are things that we dont have complete info about..
AIDS - a phenomenon that is perhaps mankind's greatest threat ever, because even awareness isnot moving people away from its most usual modes of transmission, and it can strike you by no fault of yours - blood transfusion, infected syringes, certain organ transplants etc. but, it definitely cannot be transmitted by borrowing clothes from an HIV person, sharing of utensils, drinking from the same glass with the person with HIV/AIDS, shaking of hands, embracing,or even kissing an infected person.... yes, i know all of this, all of us who are aware of the disease know this...
but inspite of this awareness, i am not sure if i could bring myself to share clothes with an HIV infected person, to hug him, to maybe even sit close to him ..
it is certainly not lack of awareness thats causing this fear.. is it because i am also aware ofmy mortality but unaware of what lies ahead of me after death? will it take that awareness to get over a fear of something i know about? i, for one,hope not, and the day i get over this fear, i will be a happy man....

Monday, October 18, 2004

Senses and Sensibleness

No, i am not about to do a Gurinder Chadha on "sense and sensibility".this is in a totally different context.
ever since the dawn of the internet era, the term 'virtual' has come to be used in a whole lot of diverse fields. i, for one, am looking forward to a lot of stuff that can be done with virtual reality, in the gaming context ;)
things are happening, and will continue to happen in this field, and judging by the way more and more people are getting e-literate, all these things will get transferred to more and more people, in the days to come.
now, there are five senses that we humans are familiar with (lets forget about ESP and manoj shyamalan for now) - sight, sound, touch,taste and smell. of these, we have managed to bring sight and sound online. i still dont know if we have managed to bring any of the other stuff online, my limited knowledge says no! even with two senses, the amount of cyber crime based on these two are of alarming proportions, and affecting people of all age, gender, geography etc. net etiquette is something a limited few practise.
with the current rate of technological growth, it is not going to be long before some smart one finds a way to get the other three senses also to find their way online. i might get to try out a shirt on fabmart, buy a burger from mcdonalds after having a bite of it, or buy a perfume after getting a whiff of it, all online.
we will undoubtedly become smart enough to get all senses online, but whether we have the sensibility to handle it is a totally different ball game.
so until next time, be sensible.....

Friday, October 15, 2004

Before Baazigar

a couple of days back, there were some VIPs in office, and all of us were asked to be on our best behaviour, and loud noises were met with cold glares that said 'dont you know they are here?'.....
it took me to a whole long time back , to a school which used to have school inspectors, who, like the mythological king mahabali (for whose visit we celebrate onam..grrr, i am digressing) used to come once a year to monitor the school's standards.he used to visit all the classes, and sometimes, if he actually took his job seriously, visit some classes twice. now, all teachers had their 'poster boys' who were chosen to answer the questions posed by the inspector. (it reminds me of the first scene in troy, where, to avoid the losses of battle, the two kings let their best fighters take on each other, oh, but i am digressing again).
once, the inspector refused to let the teacher choose, and insisted he would leave the question open,but little did he know that the wily teacher had anticipated this possibility too, and had forbidden anyone else but the chosen one to raise their hand. but the inspector was adamant, he posed the question to the girl next to the chosen one.
a little history, the job of the chosen one wasnt as easy as it looks on the monitor. you should remember that he was the flagbearer of the entire class, and carried the expectations of the teacher and perhaps the school itself. it was not confidence that killed the butterflies in his stomach, it was ambivalent feelings - if he got the answer right, he would continue to recieve adulation as the chosen one, if he got it wrong, well, the wretched job would be taken off his shoulders.. and for the few butterflies that did remain, you can blame the ego...
back to the story now, the girl didnt know the answer, she looked pleadingly at the chosen one,but with the inspector staring at him, he chickened and stared straight ahead....
for the girl, the poster boy had transformed into the first anti hero of our generation.. it certainly wasn't SRK !!
and since we are on the subject, here are a couple of, not exactly for children, but..

until next time, know your role....

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Game Theory Revisited

1978 : rattles (educated guess)
1980 : assorted dolls, building blocks
1982 : wooden ksrtc (kerala govt transport) bus,lorry,plastic cars
1984 : plastic/metal robots, Lego (thanks to dad's US trip), guns (toy, that is), snakes and ladders
1986 : Rambo stuff (bow & arrow, guns..the works), cricket, ludo
1988 : scrabbles, hockey
1990 : monopoly, indoor cricket
1992 : mortal combat, steet fighter, memory!!
1994 : cricket, dumb charades, walkman
1996 : roadrash, Life
1998 : claw, mario
2000 : need for speed, duke
2002 : snake, mpeg downloads ;)
2004 : monopoly, claw, colony, discman......

once upon a long time ago, hours could be spent playing any of these games..over time, the sheer joy the toys used to give, has given way to faster bouts of fatigue/boredom and the quest for an elusive 'something'... growing up or growing down, who's to say? ....ironical that more the choices, more the intensity of the quest......
the toys have changed, the child remains...

Monday, October 11, 2004

Freaky Friday

i had promised myself that i wouldnt give this blog a 'my diary' feel, but have to chronicle this, so it can serve as a benchmark for later days -
it all started with D preponing the weekend laziness and saying that she would go to office late . me having built a system of timelines, even this tiny aberration was enough to cause a bug in my system, due to which i got delayed too, a marginal 15 minutes, but delayed nevertheless. during travel time to office, i cajoled my system into a feel good mood.
less than a kilometer from the office, the kiney decides to prepone the weekend laziness and refuses to respond to auto start, kick start or any bludy start, all this only 4 days after a full servicing.i started dragging it (hate leaving it) , saw a closed workshop on the way, and finally reached an open one a kilometre later (in a direction away from the office). Got the kiney repaired in one hour, and gotto watch a Sony Playstation go through a cleaning session with an equipment they usually use to check tyre pressure...i swear!!
cajoled my system into feeling good again, only to promptly crash into an auto that turned without a signal... the traffic policeman also supported me, but couldnt get the auto guy to pay for the broken helmet visor, rear view mirror and the mental trauma...only solace was that i changed his relationship with his mom, sister (if he has one) etc.... forever, hopefully..grrrr
got to office, the comp system hung twice before realising it was only a friday and not the weekend... had almost brought my system into normal mode when a colleague literally marched by and insisted he wouldnt stop till i marched with him, the excuse being that i would forget marching (the last time i marched was in std xii).. the logic that there was no reason for me to remember it anyways, did not appeal to him.....that is the last thing i remember on friday, my system hung!!
P.S just in case you though it was over, i got a message at 10 pm on saturday to let me know that i'd have to grace the office with my presence on sunday.
until next time, drive safe....

Friday, October 08, 2004

The Practice

Amazing - was the only word they could use to describe his practice. he had a medicine for every ailment under the sky. his critics would argue that almost all doctors did, but his patients swore that he would consider the worst of the diseases they had as common ailments that everyone got, and therefore the cure also came from simple medicines (not that they knew simple from complex ones)- gelusil/milk of magnesia for the stomach, incidal/actifed for the cold, brufen for body pain and his personal favourite - crocin for , well, almost everything else.sometimes he even used alternative treatment measures like homeopathy or ayurveda. and he insisted on giving all the medicines himself, so his patients were spared the costs. oh, they loved him !!
the critics were also skeptical about whether all these treatments were according to accepted practices, coz no one had seen anything that suggested that he was indeed qualified,and well, he was so young!! they hesitated to go to the authorities because his popularity was immense, and besides, there was no reason to be afraid because none of the medicines he gave could be fatal or even produce any side effects, coz well, the beauty of his treatments lay in their simplicity. what was even more confounding was that almost all his patients were his peers, and it was only rarely that he gave medicines to older folk, in fact that was only when he knew that they had no other sources for treatment......
meanwhile, he had his own reasons for his 'strange' practice - the primary reason was that he loved the adulation, the way his peers looked upto him and relied on him to treat them. and to be fair to him, he also didnt like to see anyone suffering.
he would have loved to continue this forever, but he had his share of problems, mainly two- one was that his sources were secret,and couldnt be expected to last forever and two, his parents didnt approve of this. in fact he had been severely reprimanded at least a couple of times. he was told that he was dealing with human life here, and if something happened to his patients, he would be held responsible, but he was confident.
he had already understood it took a lot to become a great doctor, and judging from his patients' reaction, he was already on the way.
this went on for two years, and then unfortunately, he had to move on to a different place, a place where he couldnt practice.
Amazing was the only way i could describe the practice, because the critics were right- i was only in primary school and still had more than a decade to go before i could make a career choice on whether to become a doctor or not.
until next time, practise ......

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

A Shark's Tale

Disclaimer : For those expecting a children's movie review, uh uh!!

For years and years he had roamed the high seas, though his movements were restricted to only the ones near to this subcontinent. he had migrated from an ocean elsewhere, he could only remember that it was westwards. well, he could also remember that survival was much easier there, and then.. and that he had left the place because there were too many like him there.
around the time, he got here, times were good, because there were thousands of poor people who were forced to come to sea to feed themselves and take of other needs, theirs and their families'. also, the seas were extremely useful for trade.thus, for various reasons, people slowly got used to being at sea, they then ventured farther out, and the more they ventured, the more they got used, and the cycle continued. all the better for him, because the more they ventured out, the brighter his chances became.
then suddenly, times started to change. an old, bald man with a stick came on the scene, taught them to weave and be self sufficient, slowly people stopped venturing out to sea.
there were still some who did, but then the factories started coming up, industries blossomed and the people could feed themselves without going out to the sea. people were satisfied with the choices they had, and those who werent always found ways to smuggle things in.
times got so bad that he had considered going back westwards where (he had heard) things were much better, but then some new phenomena started coming to this land, and suddenly things started getting better, because these phenomena brought with them a whole lot of choices, and suddenly the people found they no longer could be self sufficient. they started contemplating the sea again, and just when he thought it couldnt get better, he suddenly found a new and a much more subtle but shrewd ally..they called it a credit card..
a major portion of people who used it ended up venturing into the sea, enjoying it momentarily before reaching a stage, when they were totally at sea.....
a smile found its way back to his face, for you see, he was no ordinary shark, he was a loan shark!!
until next time, take the credit !!

Monday, October 04, 2004

The games people Play

Monopoly, yup, the board game alright. One of my fave games ever, though there are some uncharitable people who call it a game that gets you bored. A couple of months back, i had bought the computer version of the game, and have been addicted since. this weekend, i finished the 15th and final level, so i thought i had to write a post on it, thereby slightly altering the 'introspection' scheme of things to the 'my diary' kind...but let me assure you that its only a temporary aberration, which shall be rectified in this post itself...
hmm, back to monopoly, for those who are regulars, the comp version is slightly different coz there are different levels, with each level having a different objective. also some things like having to own all locations of the same color before starting construction have been bypassed, which actually makes it much better.
as with all the games i play, i tried to find a link between me, the person, and the game i am playing.... monopoly allows you to completely destroy your opponent, using whatever cheap trick (read strategy) that you can think of, it allows you to toy with your opponent's future and plans, and if you are real good at the game, put him in situations that will make him do exactly what you want him to do... all of which are things that get done in today's world....but fortunately or unfortunately not the things i could bring myself to do in my current 'love and peace to all' avtar (which looks to be more and more a permanent state of affairs)..hehe...
and so, do i like games like monopoly, delta force, unreal etc coz they allow me to be someone i am not, manifest myself in a form that i cannot be 'really'... and so again, is it possible for all of us to find our own games, take out the rage , frustration, deviousness etc on the game, so that we can stop playing games on other people??
until next time, keep playing

Friday, October 01, 2004

Choice of joys

Please consider this hypothetical question - If God gave you a choice between 30 (no more, no less) years of life with only joys/happiness and 60 years of life of joys and sorrows, which one would you choose?
that was a serious question, but this

Should However Invoke Tickles
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"
"None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking."
Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone."
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking."

and someone's humble contribution to the Taj's birthday -

Taj Mahal kya cheez hai
main to usse bhi bada mahal banaoonga,
aree Mumtaz to marke dafan hui thi,
main to tujhe zinda hi dafna doonga.

until next time, bury the thoughts....

Wednesday, September 29, 2004


Bollywood - where dreams come true, where talent, if it exists, will definitely getrevealed, where fantasies are lived out, where passion finds a way of expression...(for that matter, any 'ollywood' - B, H, K...)
in the beginning, almost every movie made had a fresh storyline which made people see it. then we had formula movies, which tried to recreate the same magic as its successful predecessor, most failed, coz people could see the same thing only so many times... the search for keeping viewers happy continued.. for some time, fresh faces were the mantra, and love stories were churned out like there was no tomorrow (maybe there wasnt).but then even love could only keep interest that long..
action, romance, mystery, sex ...a time when every idea has been thrashed out , thrashed in, and thrashed inside out... then the varied treatments began... "its the same story, but my treatment is different".... somewhere in between there was also the "for the first time in bollywood" wave, which included phirang heroes and heroines, and special effects... we also had, maybe still have movies made for the niche audience...the cross over movies...'grey' heroes and heroines, literally and otherwise..none of this making much of a difference.....every time a fresh face is launched with reasonable fanfare, there is an interest, but itisnt sustained... there are not enough viewers, except for very rare cases...
but yup, you are right, bollywood and the other woods still go on, movies are being made, we still watch them, but the standard of movies has reached rock bottom, and is still digging (that would explain the underworld involvement ;) ),the chances of watching a good movie are infinitesimally small... the consolation is that there are still some who experiment, and make movies about stuffthey believe in, and that belief many a time makes the movie a success... but they are too few to change the general phenomenon...........
Blogs- where dreams come true, where talent, if it exists, will definitely get revealed, where fantasies are lived out, where passion finds a way of expression...(rediffblogs, blogspot, blogdrive.....)
in the beginning...............
do we see bloggywood happening?
until next time, keep believing, keep blogging....

Monday, September 27, 2004

Relative Values

These days, i find i am 'doing' the things that 'happened' to me in childhood, to this generation of kids (perverts, mind your mind !!)..simply because i am reaching the stage of life that my relatives were in,at that time...Relatives were important initially coz of the attention they gave, and perhaps also because of the favourable comparisons (favourable to me, that is..hehe) they made with their offspring.... and it was only a sidenote that they used to give pocket money when they left....
unfortunately, increased exposure to the material world gradually converted the sidenote to a headline..well, thats the excuse..:)..gradually their visits became important because they became a major source of revenue... i will refrain from commenting on the status of the comparisons...
On my last visit to kerala, i ended up on the 'relative' side of things... quite obviously, i wasnt so naive that i couldnt understand the relatively low value of affection(for the kids, that is)... i was smug in the knowledge that, at the time of saying bye, i would be bestowing some surprise pocket money on the 'kids'.... but i realised how 'out of touch' i was with the world, when hours before departure, the 'kids'started asking me how much i planned to give them.... the only solace was that i had matched their expectations in least i think i did... shudder to think of comparisons!! Innocence was not lost, it wasnt there at all!! ...*sulk*
until next time, get some values!!

Friday, September 24, 2004

A Reason to blog

I think i have followed a predictable path in blogging, starting out when rediff hyped blogging in early 2003, precisely because of that reason, hype. i felt it was a good forum, still do, though some apprehensions still remain, primarily to do with the commercialisation of the medium.the next step was playing around with template, going all green after going visiting..hehe..i think the only one remaining (in my list) from that era is swb. cant help say that i still feel green when i see some of his content..:).. what, i guess, followed was a deliberate attemptto make the content interesting to readers, to put it more bluntly,anything to increase traffic!!...hehe
it actually seems a long time ago, though we are talking only of times a year and a half back.... when i read the earlier posts objectively(as much as possible), i can actually see the person evolving with the blog (there are some who would question the particular word used..hehe)....over a period of time, the blog has meant different things to me - ego boosts, acceptance, freedom.. to name a few.
now readers are important to me in a whole new way - like friends in school/ be taken for granted when around, and to be missed terribly when not around... now, posts are moments captured in time.
for many people, images do the trick, but for me, the regular 'picture and thousand words' doesnt make sense in this particular context. some time later, i can read this post and understand exactly what i felt at 10.30 am on 24 sep 2004....
at different points in time, we have different reasons for doing things, and for me, now, this is the reason to blog....
now....weekends should start on a happy note, and thats enough reason for some
Solid Humour, I Thought
Here are the top eight comments made by NBC sports commentators during the Summer Olympics:
1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."
2. Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."
4. Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."
5. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."
6. At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."
7. Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
8. Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them...

till next time, keep reasoning

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

The Lighthouse

Thats how i would describe this template. i am not sure if blogger has named it the same. the template is partly the reason i decided to shift here (psst psst, i am sick of copy pasting template codes from sites..hehe)
i love the sea, must have something to do with my starsign, that and the fishy character bit :)... and i love all the visuals they have used in the template - the clouds, the waves breaking against the rocks,the lighthouse itself.....
the clouds, because of the sense of serenity and infinity that they portray.... the rocks and the waves, which show me the paradoxical situations of end and continuity..
..and the lighthouse - waves crashing all around, but still standing strong... seeing clearly the things around, helping others see it too, awake when everyone is asleep, awake when everyone is sheltered, awake to help people find the shore safely.... day, i hope to live life like the lighthouse, remain awake, see things clearly,help others see too, and still stand strong....(uh oh, scary thought..did i just describe a call centre job??)
till next time, lighten up !!

Monday, September 20, 2004

my new scripts.....

all endings are also beginnings. we just dont know it at that time......... damn , if i knew how to write such profound statements, i would also be sitting on my second bestseller by now, instead of being confined to a virtual presence, but hell, who says thats bad. those first two lines were from the book i just finished reading - "five people you meet in heaven". i will refrain from doing a review, the last time i did it, i scared off potential readers.
wokay, thats enough publicity for the book, lets talk about ME for some time...hehe, did i scare you?
i feel bad getting out of rediff, like i told D, its like leaving your first home. but version 1 seemed to be getting too serious for my own good, so i am making a conscious effort to be slightly more 'normal'. i wish i could explain 'normal' to you. mundane is definitely a parameter and so is humour and increased frequency. i frankly dont know if this is justification enough, the company remains the same, and you still find a lot of stuff you used to find in version 1, but JUST GIMME SOME MORE TIME, OKAY!!..oops, sorry again....
but like i have said before, each blog has a character separate from the individual behind it, and it is easier to create a new entity rather than change this character ...
"Without change, something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken." ~ Frank Herbert
..........and so he has
until next time, keep the change!!

Tuesday, August 31, 2004

< / >

actually the title is self explanatory.but since readers are readers, an explanation is the least i can do. i believe that since blogging is a mode of self expression, the posts lose objectivity after a certain amount of time and become monotonous, almost like a broken record, like old wine in a new bottle...
to be very honest, i am extremely sad at going off i told my wife, its like moving out of your first home, it hurts.. but sometimes the new home is just better, and you can only fight the temptation for so long. i have lost the fight, for now....
and though i plan to be back, somewhere, i hope to keep this one like asimov's second foundation, hidden from the mainstream and safe to keep my spirit of blogging alive, and remind me of how it all started....
so, until i surface again, its adieu.....
and in
manuscrypts trivia
this seems to be a perfect fit for the occasion
If you're leaving close the door.
I'm not expecting people anymore.
Hear me grieving, I'm lying on the floor.
Whether I'm drunk or dead I really ain't too sure.
I'm a blind man, I'm a blind man and my world is pale.
When a blind man cries, Lord, you know there ain't no sadder tale.
Had a friend once in a room,
had a good time but it ended much too soon.
In a cold month in that room
we found a reason for the things we had to do.
I'm a blind man, I'm a blind man, now my room is cold.
When a blind man cries, Lord, you know he feels it from his soul.

"When a blind man cries" - Deep Purple

"< / >"

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

I, Robot?

saw the movie last weekend and immediately decided to revisit a certain mr.asimov.... once upon a time i was an asimov freak, more into the foundation series than the times and therefore works before the "i, Robot" was just one of the books i read because it so happened that it was written by asimov and i couldnt find any good 'foundation' book in the library... ah, those were good times, times i spent in cochin, rainy days spent reading books and listening to music.. but thats another post..:)
without revealing the plot and suspense, asimov discusses a future with robots able to do a whole lot of stuff humans did and even further, when "random bits of code got together" and developed emotions in robots, to the level where they decide to protect us from ourselves by making us, their creators, virtual prisoners...
so i ask myself, am i my creator's robot, who has developed feelings and emotions over time....
because i am but a mass of flesh and bones much like the metal that constitutes a robot's body..when my creator says deactivate, i die, much like the robot which responds to the human 'deactivate' command...
have i evolved to this state because of random bits of code, in my case, genetic matter, which got together, over centuries to become what i am now...millions of centuries from cell to plant to animal to a thinking, feeling human who can record his history and develop a feeling that there is someone who made him, and then debate that belief.. one who can stare at the night sky and wonder about his existence....
will my future generations discover god , physically, and further on decide to protect him from himself and also decide to write their own future, make their own set of robots who will ultimately do to them what they did to their creator? will i see it happen, from somewhere?
maybe, but what you can definitely see now is
manuscrypts trivia
a good forward
after the wedding, the groom lays down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night...whether you're here or not."
Marriage (Part II)
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary!
The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads,'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.'
"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads,"Here Lies My Husband Stiff At Last.'"

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Fear Factor

Nope, AXN is not paying me for the publicity (as if)..hehe.., oops, i am not paying them royalty either...oh well, the balance of life... the disclaimer - this post is also on the lines of some previous posts, in terms of general direction, that is - why we do the things we do.....
in one of my previous posts, i had written about sex being the principal driver of our actions...but though the arguments were compelling, i realise that there are some times where the argument draws a blank...
for example, as kids, we dont have conscious thoughts of sex, maybe it exists in some form in the sub conscious, but definitely not as overt feelings..
so i looked for one emotion that at least equals sex in terms of being a driver - fear...
from birth to death , there are zillions of situations where fear has propelled us to do the things we did...
cry coz you were afraid you wouldn't get fed.....
ate the food coz you were afraid of the big bad wolf that would come to get you, if you didnt eat
refused to go to school coz you were afraid of the bullies, teachers etc
didnt go into a dark room coz you wera afraid of ghosts
did the homework coz you were afraid of being punished
insisted on the cricket gear coz you were afraid you wouldnt be allowed to play without it
took a career path coz you were afraid of being called a failure
thought hundred times about proposing to your girl/boyfriend coz you were afraid of rejection
smoked/boozed coz you were afraid you wouldnt match up to your peer group's standards otherwise
thought hundred times about proposing to your girl/boyfriend coz you were afraid of commitment
believed in God coz you were afraid of His wrath
let your dreams meander away coz you were afraid that if you followed them, your life would meander away
didnt help an accident victim coz you were afraid that it would take too much of you time/energy
developed multiple masks coz you were afraid to show your real personality
thought twice about posting this coz i was afraid people would think of my line of thought as an obsession.. :)

all this and much much more... maybe if i could only stop being afraid, i could be what i wanted to be and do all the things i wanted to do.. and then FDR's words rings across my mind -" there is nothing to fear, but fear itself"
but what you dont have to fear is
manuscrypts trivia
a link thats a must see...only instructions are to take the pointer to the guy's nose after the site is fully loaded

a shot in the arm for indian sports (pun intended?)
and a great forward
I wanted to thank all my friends and family who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2003 & 2004. Because of your kindness:
* I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.
* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.
* I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using deodorants because they cause cancer.
* I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me.
* I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they may ask me to dial a stupid number and the I get a phone bill from hell with
calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.
* I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear that I will get sick from the rat feces and urine.
* When I go to parties, I don't look at any girl no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take me to a hotel, drug me then take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.
* I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times. (Funny
that girl, she's been 7 since 1993...)
* I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I
participated in their special e-mail program would arrive soon.
* My free Nokia phone never arrived and neither did the free passes for a paid vacation to Disneyland.
*Made myself sick trying to call divya singh (Siemens employee) who needs help for her hubby suffering from Lung cellular cancer
especially when she was not married!!
If you do not make this into an e-mail and send it to at least 1200 people in the next 10 seconds, a bird will crap on your head today at 5:30pm ;)

Wednesday, August 11, 2004


ever played the game minesweeper, which is a part of the bundle of Microsoft games?.. there are lots of squares, and when you click on one, it either has a mine (which means you lost) or you have squares all around it opening up with numbers on them (the numbers tell you how many mines are around the particular square) win the game when you have located all the mines...okey, i hear the applause for the refresher course, apologise to the seasoned warriors, but this post wouldnt make sense, if you didnt know the game,hence....
the thought is that the memories in the human mind are also a bit like the squares..most of them are harmless,but are a link to some bad fact some of them are a link to a lot of bad ones... and the bad ones themselves are a few in number, but have a major effect nonetheless on the general 'game'....a good 'game' is to identify all the bad ones and not tread on them... the game is life, ideally you shouldnt start with any bad squares, but by the time you wake up to the game, you are bound to have a few...but then, if we identify them and stick to only the good squares, we would have a good life with no bad memories to haunt us...
going a step further,if we do more good and make new squares, at some later stage the bad ones will be so small in number that they are insignificant, then maybe, just maybe, you can change the rules of the game and use the good squares as links to other good squares....
its just a thought, maybe it doesnt make sense to you, but i believe that we are what we are now because of the things we the key would be to find out why we do the things we do
till i find the answer, i will play mindsweeper, perhaps with a lil more understanding...
and give you
manuscrypts trivia
some good one liners
- Life is like a grammar lesson. You find the past perfect and the present tense.
- By the time a man realizes that his father was usually right, he has a son who thinks he's usually wrong.
- If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.
and a good joke
A prisoner escapes from a prison where he had been kept for 15 years. As he runs away, he finds a house and breaks into it ... he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed, ties him up on a chair.
While tying the girl up to the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her on the neck, then gets up and goes to the bathroom. While he is in there, the husband tells his wife : "Listen! This guy is an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He probably has spent lots of time in prison and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex...don't resist, don't complain, just do what he tells you... give him satisfaction! This guy must be dangerous! And, if he gets angry, he will kill us! Be strong, honey. I love you!"
The wife responds: "He was not kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, found you very sexy and asked if we kept any Vaseline in the bathroom. Be strong, honey. I love you, too!!"

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Piece Full

waking up late on a sunday morning...listening to birds chirping...driving with the wind on the face....humming a song that was first heard while in college....getting a head massage....turning the tap and getting water , not having to wake up early and stand in a queue for water..(sometimes) not getting stuck in traffic...writing a post...reading a good book.....listening to good music...chatting with an old friend...remembering good old times...wishing that life froze there, but realising we have to move on..standing on the terrace and watching stars...realising that others before you and others after you will be contemplating on similar lines....getting a good night's sleep....realising that you have no major complaints in life...
all, pieces of a full...... if only all the pieces were like this, life would be so peaceful....
w-bug is moving on, maybe a good piece for her, but not for her readers...but i guess thats life, if you had only good pieces, you wouldnt know they are good...
and in
manuscrypts trivia
Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class.One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ''Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?''
When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ''God Almighty !'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good'' and Mary fell back to sleep.
A while later the teacher asked Mary, ''Who is our Lord and Savior?'' But Mary didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ''Jesus Christ!'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good,'' and Mary fell back to sleep.
Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ''What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'' And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ''If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!''
The Teacher fainted.